Clef Notes: When You’re the Asshole

You ever realize in real-time that you’re being an asshole? I have… let me tell you a story…

So I had a particularly bad day at work. I head to the gym afterwards, per usual. While I’m there my friend texts me to meet up at the bar next door to the gym I’m at. Any of my fitness friends know that consuming protein and/or carbs immediately after a workout will go straight to your muscles as they begin to recover. Obviously I’m not going to bring my rice cakes and protein bar into the restaurant with me…

There’s a side entrance to the restaurant that seems like no one uses… probably closed off to the public. So I sit on the stoop as I wait for my friend. Chowing down on my Quest bar.

Then this girl walks up. Unlit cigarette in her hand as if she was about to light it. She approaches the stoop and I’m thinking, “There’s no way this bitch is about to light up a cigarette and stand right next to me…. CLEARLY I’m eating here!”

Naturally, since I came from the gym next door, I had my headphones in. So I couldn’t hear it when she pulled out her house keys and unlocked the door to her apartment… not the restaurant.

It was then that I realized that I was the asshole sitting on her stoop.

Sometimes we can all be assholes, what’s important is that you know when it happens.

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